I going to say something that may already have been said in the comments, I don't know, I'm not reading through them to check. - Anyway -

Here's the thing. Your husband-ex, current fuckwit may have said the vows at the wedding but he didn't mean them or hear them.

You're not any worse, better or different than 99% of wives who become mothers. Life was a piece of pie until kids. Everyone suffers, everyone is tired, most people hate the job, EVERYONE gets sick of the routine. It's hard. That's the deal. He's supposed to set aside selfishness. It's SUPPOSED to be about you. And the kids.

You were SUPPOSED to be one that mattered more than anything else, until you made more important reasons to live, your youngsters.

He didn't fucking read and understand the vows. He only read them.

It is supposed to be all about you, and when you feel it and know it and count on it, you give the love back so you can keep feeling that way.

And after kids, (still diapered) YOU still want sex and NEVER say no?!? That is championship wife material--not trophy--champion-GOAT status.

Sorry. He's a dick. And you're not supposed to be perfect.